in case you're not sure what you're looking at, i'll give you a hint: the baby's bottom is facing the top left hand corner of the picture. there are 2 legs on either side of something sort of dangly, which is pointing to the bottom right corner. i'm telling you right now that this is the most graphic picture you'll ever see of baby stew#2, at least on this blog! i'm planning on changing tristan's blog title to: "The Littlest Stews" and will post his pictures privately with tristan's from now on.
now then, here's how the day went. even though every single day we pray that josh will have work, i secretly hoped that today he wouldn't because i knew that if there was work for him, there would be no way he could pass up the opportunity, since work has been scarce, meaning i'd be going to the appointment alone. well, by 7am we were pretty sure that he wouldn't be working today! he ended up going to work at a side job this morning and was home in time to drive me to the hospital in san diego, while tristan was whisked away by his gran. i was SO thankful that he was able to be there with me because he hasn't been able to make it to a single appointment so far and i knew that photos would never do justice to capture the whole ultrasound experience for him.
i've never had an ultrasound where my bladder has to be full. i was supposed to drink 32oz of water an hour before my scheduled appointment. i measured carefully and took the water with me in the car and, once it was all gone, i was thinking "this is no problem!" we were about 20 minutes away when suddenly, the urge to pee hit me rather strongly and without warning. in any normal situation, i'd have had my eyes peeled for the nearest mcdonalds, ready to jump out and use their restroom, but that was not an option. instead i made little moaning sounds and tapped my foot rapidly while josh stifled laughter, apologizing every time he smirked. i can't even begin to tell you how much it hurt just to walk. every step felt like the entire gravity of the earth was pulling down on my bladder, begging it to burst. we took the wrong elevator at first and i tried desperately to breathe calmly and focus on not wetting myself!
the waiting room was pretty empty and, though there were 3 receptionists behind the desk, it took about 5 minutes for anyone to sign me in. after typing away for about half a year, the lady behind the counter asked for my copay and then the silly debit machine wouldn't work! she even made a comment saying "my my, everything is so SLOW today!" to which i replied "yeah, everything takes longer when your bladder is full". once i had paid, i waddled over to where josh was sitting, and at that point i seriously wondered whether i would be able to hold it all in while bending to sit down. thankfully i managed to sit down without any leakage and then my name was called a few moments later.
the ultrasound technician led us to a room RIGHT across the hall from the bathroom, which makes sense. at the time, however, i thought it was really cruel to taunt us full-bladdered people with the promise of relief just beyond our reach. he asked me to lay down and as soon as i did, my bladder must have found a few more inches of room because it became really quite bearable after that. the whole thing lasted nearly 45 minutes and it was wonderful! he asked us how many kids we have and if we're hoping for a boy or a girl. we both admitted a girl would be nice, and then he got busy finding kidneys and a spine and brain etc. to measure. when he got near the legs he said "oh, it looks like you might be having a boy" but he didn't say much more after that and continued his measuring and entering numbers. awhile later he said "yeah, that really looks like a boy" but it wasn't until the very end when he was done measuring and went over the baby's body one more time for us, explaining what each part was. he looked below the legs and said "do you see that there?" and then took the picture that i have on this post. there's no denying it, its definitely a boy!
i am going to be absolutely and totally honest right here: i felt not one single ounce of disappointment. i only beamed and the first thing i thought of was tristan with his little brother, buddies for life (or so i hope!) that moment of elation was quickly followed by panic when i realized that now we'll definitely have to go for #3, but i pushed that thought out of my mind and just enjoyed the newness of knowing.
making a few phone calls on the way home, i referred to the baby as a "he" for the first time and later used his name "samuel." it sounded so right, especially when i talk about "tristan and samuel", it just really seems to flow.
the name we have picked out so far is Samuel David Ryan. samuel, because we both love the name as well as the Bible story that goes along with it. david for josh's middle name, my brother's middle name, johnny's middle name and josh's cousin's first name (who died in the war). and ryan is for josh's best friend who died when he and josh were in high school. after rolling those names around in our mouths for awhile, josh declared on the way home that he wasn't so sure about samuel anymore. he still likes the name, but really doesn't care for the nicknames "sammy" or "sam". i don't care for the nicknames either, so my solution would be to only call him samuel, but josh isn't convinced yet. so, we still may change our minds, but as of now i'm going to start calling this baby samuel because i've been dying to call him something other than "it" for a long time!
of course, its also wonderful that we have most everything we need for a little boy. we have so many clothes that tristan wore, plus a lady at church already told me that if its a boy she has lots of baby clothes to give to me. the main thing we'll need is diapers and wipes and more diapers, so if i get another shower, that's what i'll be requesting! i know its still early, but i can't wait to start going through the bins of baby clothes and washing and folding and putting them in little drawers. two boys, wow! i'm still getting used to the idea. its going to be quite the ride!!
