Friday, June 25, 2010

boys are gross



samuel is such a BOY. don't get me wrong, his older brother is also very much a boy, but samuel is truly turning into the stereotypical boy...the dirty kind. while tristan can't handle having sticky hands, (he often begs to wash his hands in the middle of a meal because he got food on them) samuel isn't phased in the slightest by being sticky head to toe. and while tristan sort of freezes and clenches his hands under his chin when a large dog comes up to sniff him, samuel opens his mouth wide and sticks his tongue out in greeting, hoping that the dog will lick his face.

because we live next to a sort of waterway that is full through winter and dry as a bone in summer, we get a lot of frogs living in our backyard in the shade of the fence line, especially in the damp soil that my flowers live in. i love these little guys because they eat the bugs that may want to attack my flowers and they are just so darn cute. tristan loves them also....he picks them up and tries to get them to jump down his slide. sometimes he'll make a little home for them in the basket on his tricycle with some grass and water and a rock or two. just a few days ago i read in a parenting magazine that frogs can spread salmonella to kids, so i've been extra sure that tristan washes his hands after touching the frogs....not that he needs much encouragement to wash his dirty hands.

now we come to the point of this post, which is a story from this morning. so, samuel for some reason has been getting up at the crack of dawn (like 4:45am) no matter how late or early i put him down in the evening. ugh. i really shouldn't complain because he has been sleeping through the night pretty regularly, but really? 4:45?? anyway, this morning i brought him downstairs with me and i let him play on the living room floor while i lay on the couch and sort of vegged for awhile since i still felt half asleep. i saw samuel playing with josh's flip flops laying on the floor and sort of thought to myself that i should really put them away because i didn't want samuel putting them in his mouth, but i was just too lazy. the next think i know, samuel is crawling towards me at top speed, chewing on something. thinking it was a leaf, i squeezed his cheeks together forcing his little mouth open. out popped his tongue and on his tongue was something that sort of looked like a leaf....except that it was a little bit rubbery. and just as i picked it out of his mouth i realized what it was and i shrieked and flung it onto the ground. it was flattened, dead frog.

oh.my.goodness. i am still shuddering when i envision it. samuel immediately started crying, partly because i took away his chew toy, partly because i'm sure i scared him with my shrieking and partly because i tucked him under my arm, held his head over the sink and started splashing cold water into his mouth. next i sudsed up his hands with soap and washed them off and very nearly squirted some soap into his mouth as well before i thought better of it. then i put him in his highchair, poured some puffed wheat onto his tray and went back into the living room to survey the scene of the unfortunate incident.

the flattened frog looked as if it had been dead for awhile, which sort of made me feel relieved because the thought of samuel chewing it to death would have been too much for me to take in. he was, however missing a leg which i wished i hadn't noticed. because he had most probably been stuck to the bottom of josh's flip flop, i choose to believe that he lost his leg on route from the backyard to the house. i was this close to taking a picture of him and posting it on my blog, but ew. that would have been really too disgusting. so i took a paper napkin, picked him up with it and threw him into the trash, shuddering all the way.

so far samuel seems fine, though after i publish this post i am going to google "salmonella symptoms". and i have this niggling feeling that this is only the beginning. one day i will think back on the Incident of the Flattened Frog and laugh to myself that i was such a pansy. because i am quite sure that there are far more gross things in store for me to witness as the mama of two little boys.

18 comments:

Meredith said...

shuddering, gagging and laughing. Boys are great! ~M

SarahD said...

Ew! I had a horrified look on my face as I read this but it also made me laugh, haha. Is this what I have to look forward to?... At least we don't have frogs readily available in our backyard...

kelly ens said...

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! Gross!!!!!! you handled it way better than i would have :)
yuck!

Darcy and Sharon said...

Ewwwwww! Jaden picked up a slug the other day and that gave me the willies, even though it was all dried up. Boys ARE gross! Lol!

Jenn & Wade said...

That was HILARIOUS....thanks for the great story about boys and for a good laugh!!=)

Anonymous said...

Oh Heidi, that made me laugh so hard. I love that little boy Samuel. He is awesome! Can't wait to see you this afternoon. Love you all. Sis

Amy@Sassy Scarlett said...

Great story, cracked me up!

lil said...

Yep, I was going to say to Sarah D that you have slugs there!!

Grandma J. said...

Heidi, you may not remember the pieces of worm that were stuck in your hair, nor the horrified shriek I emitted when I saw what Andy had lovingly rubbed on your scalp. You were just over a year old. Thanks for the laugh - there will be plenty more adventures for you.

Sarafina said...

Can you believe boys? I would love to know the thought process...
Hilarious! I imagine by the time the boys are in middle school you will have enough of these stories to write a book of 'Incidents'!

Christy B. said...

I was cringing and near gagging as I read your story! I was re-living it with you!! Jared(my 6 year old nephew) was over the other day, and we discovered a slug on my front door. He had this man-of-the-house determined look on his face, picked up his shoe, and closed the door behind him. Next thing I knew I hear some whacks and an "oops." I opened the door to find a revolting mess of slug remains all over my front door. He claims he was just trying to flick it off with his shoe. I have been avoiding the front door ever since. Ah, the joys of boys!!

rachel joy said...

priceless! and so gross.

Thoughts on Life and Millinery. said...

Great story, and brought memories of my boy and frogs in the year we lived in Santee. Poor frogs. I still feel bad about what my three year old's pet frog was put through.

Try not to image what other gross outs are ahead for you, my dear. And don't ask for hints from Chris either. I think she is finally just getting over some of them...let those sleeping dogs lie.

Rebecca said...

Too funny Heidi! I loved it. Samuel sounds just like my kind of guy. However, I think there are plenty of girls who would have done the same thing. I used to compete with my sisters how many snails I could crush...with my bare feet! I still have no problem picking up anything that squirms, crawls, wiggles, or slithers : )

韋宣 said...

人不能像動物一樣活著,而應該追求知識和美德....................................................................

Jennifer said...

Way to boost your immunity Samuel!

Cara said...

This happened with Aimee and my Mom...it was a slug. And she was upset it was taken away too. Love you Heidi and your family.

Anneliese said...

Julene's little guy ate a cockroach ... and his parents lived to tell about it.