Wednesday, May 23, 2007

a post

i'm not sure why my last post didn't allow for comments. though it's probably best that way, seeing as most of you are on facebook anyhow and have no time for commenting ;) our anniversary was actually on monday (blogger posted it as sunday) and, though we had plans for a nice quiet meal together and a dvd after dinner, tristan didn't get the memo. thankfully he waited until i was done eating, then awoke from his bedtime with a complete meltdown. once he was done crying, he refused to go back to bed, so i just gave up and kept him awake with us for awhile and he was quite happy, for the most part. he did go back to sleep eventually, and we did get some alone time that evening, but it wasn't quite the anniversary evening i had planned in my head!

josh bought me a gorgeous hanging basket and now that i'm typing this i wish i had taken a picture of it to post. it's so perfect that at first i thought the flowers were fake! this saturday we're going out for a proper anniversary dinner at our favorite restaraunt for filet mignon, steak and lobster. mmmm... i really need to stop worrying about how tristan will do at my in law's while we go out. he's been having random meltdowns lately and doesn't do too well with anyone other than josh and i so....i have no doubt that he may scream the ENTIRE time we're gone. i'm praying that somehow God will help me concentrate only on my husband that evening and help me to not think about tristan losing his voice from crying. i so need this time away with just josh. we haven't had a date in months and i find that every time i manage to get away without tristan, i'm always stressed and rushing to get back home in case he's having a meltdown (and half of the time he is!) i had a mini meltdown of my own today, just exhausted from having a job that is 24/7 without many breaks.

i don't mean to complain here, it just sometimes feels good to be able to vent a bit and to know that those who are reading this care and that many of you have been where i am and have survived! i tell you what though, this whole mommy thing has sure made me admire those of you who have more than one kid!! i can't even fathom two at the moment!

my mom taught me that when you're feeling down a good thing to do is to think of things to look forward to. i am looking forward to tristan being past this stage (okay, so that doesn't really count!) i am looking forward to enjoying a lovely romantic dinner ALONE with my husband. i am looking forward to seeing my entire family at the same time (which hasn't happened in three years) in july. i am looking forward to planting my new flower bed. i am looking forward to falling asleep tonight.

good night!

8 comments:

Lovella said...

Where is everybody? How can anyone compare a real written piece with a line or two here and there? Ok there is my vent.

Blogger hasn't been allowing comments on a few blogs I've visited.

When you first got married, I heard about the romance of the wedding on the beach and I smiled, now when I read your words I got all goosebumpy. How sweet.

About needing the time away and yet fretting the whole time, been there done that. Oh my goodness if only mom's could see the big picture, and know that the little one will be fine and you can be a better mom having had a break. I can say that knowing that you survived and my kids survived and yet I know that your feelings are valid and there isn't much you can do about it. big sigh.

Anyways, I'm glad you have a mom to give you a break, I bet they love him to pieces.

Shannon said...

no kidding, WHERE is everybody?!

I can count on one hand how many dates with my husband I've been on in the past 5 years. That bad. My husband is pretty unromantic in that sense so it isn't a pressing need, and we have no one to watch the kids. So you do learn to adapt and just enjoy the peaceful moments as they come or sit together and smile while you watch the children do cute things, knowing no one shares this joy of your children with you as much as your spouse.

It does get easier, we've all been through it in some sense even if some are just for a moment and others of us have it drag on for months. You're in good company.

Hope that date is awesome!

Jennifer said...

everyone is at facebook...they think it's this wonderful thing.

it's just a baby...keep on adjusting you are doing fine.

I had a new aquaintance flip out when I said maternity leave where I come from is a whole year. She was like...'how much of that was paid?' I said 'uh...all of it'
Put your babe into someone else's hands and go to work...imagine that. I think it's cruelty. Sure sounds like it would be to the both of you at this point ;)

Anyways I had to go on about that topic. I could win Shannon's competition of my husband is the most/least...blah blah blah...et cetra in a blink.

running wildly said...

Although facebook is wonderful, it still doesn't do quite the same tinglies all over for me as blogger does. So I'm still here. And my bit is....just keep pluggin' away, darling. You'll get there one day at a time.

Danna said...

I agree with RW, that although facebook is neat, I still enjoy blogging so one doesn't need to have to keep repeating oneself...one post and it's done.(Not to mention that some people are just friends to catch up and that's about it in some cases)

I was disappointed that I couldn't leave a comment on your anniversary post.
Happy Belated Anniversary to you and Josh and I hope that you will have an enjoyable evening out with Josh and try not to worry about Tristan to much.

Sarafina said...

happy belated anniversary to you two from me too! your wedding sounds so lovely, simple and romantic!! I hope you have a wonderful date tonight with your hubby...I can totally identify with needing that badly and finding it hard to do.
Looking forward to things helps me a lot too...post pictures of your flower bed if you get a chance when it's done (0:

sara said...

Heidi,
Your wedding was absolutely perfect!! Everything about it.....you and Josh are such a perfect match, God sure knew what he was doing...like always! Hope you enjoyed your dinner, Mike and I did Black Angus last night solo =0)
What the heck is Facebook?! I thought I got out of the dark ages with my hi-speed but i guess not!

kelly said...

i hope you're able to enjoy your time away with josh. Taeya lost her voice a few times when she was about his age (even when I was around), and she got over it...and her crying was quieter :)