Tuesday, November 17, 2009

speaking of pacifiers....



...did you know that in england they're called dummies? and that where i'm from they're called soothers? and that my youngest son is absolutely A-D-D-I-C-T-E-D to his?

but before i get into that whole topic, thinking about how they're called soothers in canada caused me to remember this mouth-wateringly delicious snack that i've been missing out on for the past 5 years in all its stuck-to-my-teeth glory:



sour soothers!!! seriously, now that i think of it, i can't even come up with the american equivalent of this delicious treat. we have sour patch kids, but they taste nothing like the way i remember sour soothers tasting. (*note to my mom: this would make a great little birthday present!*)

so yes, samuel cannot live...er, i mean sleep without his pacifier. tristan never had this issue. he cried no matter what, so constantly pushing a pacifier into his mouth seemed sort of useless and then, at around 5 months old, he wouldn't even allow one near him, so that was that. trust me, though, he's had his share of sleep vices that i won't get into on this post, but you can read about here.

at first i was super excited that samuel not only took a pacifier, but that he was fashionably inclined enough to graduate from the big, honkin green thing from the hospital (that looked like his face had been swallowed by it) to something a little more tasteful and cute. it was so easy to get him back to sleep after a night waking because instead of the long, drawn out process that tristan used to need, all samuel needed was a re-plug of the paci and ta-da! all of his dreams, hopes and desires were fulfilled and back to sleep he went.

except then he got a cold. and, because he couldn't breathe through his stuffed-up nose, every time i'd pop the paci into his mouth, he was forced to spit it out just to get a breath....and then he'd cry because he wanted to suck on his paci again. those were some very loooong nights. so long that i contemplated weaning him from the pacifier all together. but then samuel's nose cleared up and i banished the ridiculous thought of paci weaning from my head.

until last night. what started out as an interruption of my enjoyment of "dancing with the stars" continued into an all night marathon of "lets see how many times i can wake mommy up tonight." tristan has a cold and he really loves his brother and he hasn't quite figured out how to share that love without sharing his mass of worms....i mean germs with him as well. so now i've got 2 snotty nosed little boys, one of whom is going to see the doctor this afternoon because the worms have somehow reached both of his ears.

after i'd get out of bed to re-plug the baby, i'd stumble back into our room, fall into the sweet warmth of pillows and blankets and sleep, and have just crossed over the divide between awake and asleep before another wail would echo to me from down the hall. when that happens enough times in one night, i've discovered that one's mind can go a little crazy, concocting strange inventions such as an elasticized piece of fabric to put around the baby's head with a pacifier sewn on the front, keeping it ever near him. of course, weaning the darn thing made perfect sense in those sleepless hours, but i have to say that now that i'm fully awake (with the help of a strong cup of coffee) and the sun is shining, the thought of going through the pain of paci weaning seems a bit drastic.

so tell me, those who have had a pacifier-addicted child, do you have any regrets from not weaning it earlier, or do you have success stories from doing just that? i'm not yet convinced that i want to go down that road because i know that it can come in SO handy most of the time. when i stick that little piece of plastic magic in my baby's mouth his eyelids immediately start to get heavy and you can just see him getting ready to fall into sleep. its quite miraculous and i'm not sure if i want to give that up just yet. but i'm interested in reading others' pacifier/soother/dummy stories.


18 comments:

Leanne said...

Oh, don't give it up!! I SO wish Owen would take one because I remember the magic oh so well of Lucas loving his. At around 5ish months I attached it with one of those clip-y things at night and he learned how to put it back in his own mouth at night. Only took a few nights. He's the best sleeper EVER now. I HEART PACIFIERS.

Jennifer said...

I never regreted having non paci addicted babes.

Darcy and Sharon said...

After our girls were a few months old (don't remember how old, actually!) we gave them soothers only at bedtime. We warned them well in advance that when they were 2 they would throw them in the garbage. So on their birthday we went to the outside garbage (further away, out of sight, and out of reach!) threw the soother away and then opened birthday presents. They asked for them that night but then we told them they were big girls and big girls don't need soothers. And that was that! Jaden, however, doesn't take one.

Jodi said...

Bradley had a soother and I swore it would be gone by the time he was 2. (at his 18 month check the Dr. suggested sooner than later as 2 year olds can be possessive)

When he was little it saved me a lot of sleep.....he got old enough that I would put him down with 2 and he would find it on his own in the night. Then around 20 months I started not giving it for naps....I figured, if he didn't sleep I could handle it during the day. He also had a little bunny that helped him sleep. This worked, I was thrilled....then one night I went out for dinner with the girls. I went to tuck him in adn he had no soother! WHAT????? My husband had put him to bed without one (and without the drama I had been dreading) I figured after that we were done and we were.

We all go on our own journey but that worked for us, I was prepared to give Ethan a soother but he wants nothing to do with it and they don't give them at the hospital unless they are preemies so I am on a different path with this child. So I guess I will end this long comment with do what feels right for you and allows you to sleep (especially since Tristan is an early riser)

If you send me an email with your address I will send you some sour soothers...you shouldn't be without Jodi xox

running wildly said...

I'm a firm believer in the soother. The little boy was fully addicted, and at 12 months I weaned him. He never looked back. My purpose was to not only soothe, but to prevent the thumb sucking. I know a boy who is 5 (same age as my son) and still sucks his thumb. I can't imagine how filthy his hands are and thinking about the sucking...just....ewwwww.....oh the sicknesses they'll get.
Anyway, I'm doing the same thing with baby girl. 3 months and fully addicted. I'll wean her after a year too. If it's harder, well, it's harder. I'll roll with that then. I've never met a 5 year old who still sucks on a soother.

Ester said...

Before my baby girl (3 years ago) I had read that baby's really "need" a paci until around 6months and then it just becomes a habit. So when I had my daughter I took it away at 6 months and had no problems (too young to really miss and old enough to cope without it). I did the same thing with my son (now 14 months old) and it worked perfectly. Neither of them ever went to their thumb or anything else. Good luck with whatever you choose.

Lauren Williams said...

okay, the reality post was hilarious! but about the paci, did you know in scotland its called a dummy tit, because that is what it is? i died laughing. Anyways, Hayden still uses his paci for naps and night,but im planning and weaning soon, like yesterday, but otherwise i have no other advice on it. Its great when they can put it in themselves!

kelly ens said...

First of all, the sour keys reminded me of my craving for them in my pregnancy with Ezra - i could have eaten them for every meal. :)

Taeya was totally addicted to her soother and there were many nights that we had to go pop it in for her. I weaned her at 1 year, then 18 months - both times went back on it because she got her immunizations and once she woke up at night, we couldn't get her back to sleep. We also couldn't let her cry herself to sleep because she'd gag and throw up (super sensitive gag reflex...STILL!).
finally, a couple weeks after Ezra was born (so she was 2 and 4 months), she said to us that big girls don't have soothers and that she was a big girl (here's the story: http://oddsandens.blogspot.com/2008/11/our-big-girl.html). a bit of rewards and she was good as gold and never looked back.

with Ezra, we weaned him at 4 months because he was SO addicted, but once teething started, then we were house sitting (unfamiliar house, situation with me being gone all day at work), we started giving it back to him. he's not as addicted as Taeya was, or as much as he used to, but i definitely wouldn't put him to sleep without it! letting him cry it out at 4 months was HARD, but totally worth it. totally. but now that we're back on the soother, i don't plan to wean him until at LEAST 2 years old.
i love the soother - it soothes when they need soothing and just comes in handy so often, such as trying to put them to sleep in a different location - at least they have the soother! :)

do what's best for YOU. weigh the pro's and con's of weaning or keeping it. it's a tough choice, but whatever you decide will be right :)

kelly ens said...

oh yeah - both kids only ever got/get it for sleep times and the occasional day that the sleep department has been well under par (like today! we'll see how Ezra's evening goes!).

Sorlil said...

I never regretted using a dummy with Sorley, meant he never put things in his mouth, slept well, it soothed him during teething etc. By the time he was one and a half I used it only for bedtime and when he was ill. In the summer there, he chewed through his last dummy when his back teeth were coming in so it got binned and he never ever asked for it again!
So much better than thumb-sucking!

Jennifer said...

I do have a substitute for sour keys though.

Natalie said...

I think it's God's gift to mother's. Use it, don't worry about weaning him off it anytime soon. Liam was never crazy about it till he started teething, and then it became his best friend. He still has it at bedtime, but soon it will go bye!bye! for good!

Thoughts on Life and Millinery. said...

It was a heaven blessed day that my ever howling first born FINALLY took a paci, at about seven months. Before that it was Mom's breast or nothing...

We finally got it away from her around age two...and she promptly began thumbsucking, which continued until she was about five.
Since she had sleep issues, and is easily frustrated I wish she had kept at thumb sucking. It would have been better for her than her newer calming technique of grabbing snacks to calm herself, just like her mom. Not a good means if one wishes to keep one's figure...

The easy-peasy "no-paci ever" second born arrived with two middle fingers inserted into his mouth, and he might just possibly still enjoy them when he is sleepy from time to time. I'll have to ask his wife the next time I see her.

Thoughts on Life and Millinery. said...

PS: In Manheim Germany there is a park with guided boats on a lake. Next to the on ramp is a tree completely covered with pacifiers. Apparently it is a tradition rite of passage: Leave your paci, get a ride on the boat.

Wonder if you could get the Balboa Park Merry-go-round operators to get on board with this plan?

Bonnie said...

I love soothers! Leah was my thumbsucker who weaned herself at 2yrs old thankfully, but Kelsey was (and Carson IS) addicted. I weaned Kelsey at 15 months with no problems. I'll try to do the same with Carson.

dj kosmotronix said...

My mommy-wife puts the chili pepper on my paci so it tastes like burning, but I'm no quiter.

I like the candy ones.

-ML

laura.railing said...

Andrew never took one for more than a month when he was little. It does take more work to wean them of it! I work with kids 16-24 months at my work (learning center) and have found that that is a great age to start weaning them. They start talking/babbling more, and although there will be tears, I've successfully gotten several kids off of it. It's really hard once they're older. They get stubborn! And they get really really smart and you can't just sneak it off when they're not looking. They notice! I usually start with hiding it during the day, letting them still have it at nap, then going for longer and longer spurts during the day, and finally making it disappear some at nap too. Good age though to do it! You may want to round up all your binkies too when you decide to do it because if they're just lying all around the house it kindof defeats the purpose.

Anonymous said...

4 kids, all different loves for the binky. Ellie was addicted. a-d-d-i-c But some babies are that way, they just need the comfort of sucking... and without a pacifier they will probably end up sucking their thumbs or fingers. THAT is way harder to wean. And I dont care how cute you think it is, it isn't easy when your child has cracked skin and still insists on sucking their thumb at 6.

addicted babies- leave them alone. take it away when they are happy and not seeking it. If you can, use it for true soothing only. As they get older you gradually get rid of your 3000 pacifiers you have around the house and limit it to one that is put in a special place and only used at night. After that... DO NOT use it as a shut up crutch. Maybe even use your nightlight. moon=paci. course that is when he is older and can understant a little more.

I do hate that all my pictures have a stupid pacifier in them. A lot of that was me being too lazy to limit the paci use. You know your child.

For your current problem--- I've seen these stuffed animals with pacifiers sewn to them, so that at night when they lose the pacifier, they just re-root themselves to it. I thought that was brilliant. I have no idea if it works though.

~Shannon